Laura's Tale: A Journey of the Heart
Episode - #0001
Ever wondered what it's like to pack up your life and move to a completely different country? Not just for a vacation, but to build a new life from scratch? That's exactly what Laura Matwiejczyk did when she left her native Poland first for Germany, and then for Portugal.
I recently had the chance to talk with Laura about her expat journey, and her story offers a fascinating glimpse into the challenges, surprises, and life-changing moments that come with building a life abroad.
The First Leap: Chasing Opportunities in Berlin
Laura's expat journey began like many others—with a job opportunity.
"I was applying to many different countries and seeing what would come up," she explains. "A nice offer showed up in Berlin, so I just followed it."
Her initial expectations were ambitious: meeting new people, being more social, and exploring Berlin's rich cultural scene full of museums, parks, galleries, and concerts. But reality soon set in when she realized how much time and energy went into the basics of settling in a new country—handling paperwork, figuring out groceries, and tackling all the administrative tasks she'd previously taken for granted back home.
Berlin offered Laura an international environment where English was widely spoken, making her transition somewhat easier than it might have been in other parts of Germany. The city's cosmopolitan nature also meant access to cuisine from around the world—a stark contrast to her later experience in Portugal.
"Berlin is very specific," Laura notes. "You can have anything you want because there are people from so many countries who open their own places and bring their own recipes and quality."
The Unexpected Turn: Following Love to Portugal
Just as Laura was planning to return to Poland after feeling isolated in Berlin, life threw her a curveball—she met a Portuguese man who would become her fiancé. Instead of heading back to familiar territory, she found herself moving to Portugal, a country she hadn't previously considered.
"It's funny because I'm always joking that the reason I moved to Portugal is for the ocean and for pastel de nata," she laughs, referring to Portugal's famous custard tarts. "But of course, those aren't the real reasons."
The shift from Germany to Portugal came with dramatic changes. While her Berlin experience was about independence and self-sufficiency, her Portuguese chapter began with built-in support through her fiancé. He handled much of the initial settlement process, giving her the luxury of adapting at her own pace—particularly with language learning.
Cultural Shock: The Portuguese Way of Life
Laura's most significant cultural adjustment came with Portugal's relaxed approach to time and social interactions. Coming from task-oriented Poland and Germany, she was stunned by Portugal's social rhythm.
"In Portugal, lunch is an experience and a social event," she explains. "People don't spend an hour—they spend an hour and a half. If it's two hours, even better. And it's not only about eating; it's about talking."
She recalls her bewilderment at her first Portuguese wedding, where guests spent hours mingling and snacking outside the venue before the actual meal. "I was standing there asking my boyfriend, 'When are we going to move inside and eat lunch? Why are we standing here?' And he's like, 'What do you want? It's nice, we're talking. If you're hungry, eat a snack.'"
Other Portuguese surprises included:
Wine with work lunches (completely normal in Portugal)
Late dinner times (restaurants only starting to open around 8 PM)
The winter climate ("People don't realize that it can get cold, and apartments are badly insulated with no heating systems")
The relaxed, freestyle approach to driving
Finding Community as an Expat
One of the universal challenges of expat life is building a social circle, and Laura's experience was no exception. She found that connecting with other expats was often easier than integrating with locals who already had established networks.
"Expats with other expats is usually an easier connection because those are people who seek contacts. While natives already have their networks established—they don't have the same level of need for meeting new people."
But the transient nature of expat communities created its own heartache: "You're an expat, you're making new friends, and you're so happy about it. And then this friend is telling you, 'You know what? I'm moving out.' People come and go, and it's natural."
She also understands why expats often seek out people from their home countries: "I miss speaking Polish and want to meet someone who also speaks Polish so we can have a conversation in our mother tongue. It's way different."
The Internal Journey: What Moving Abroad Taught Her
Beyond the external adjustments, Laura's expat journey triggered profound personal growth. When asked how the experience changed her, she reflects:
"I became way more open-minded and gained much more respect for difference. It showed me that my own reality is not the only one and not the only correct one. There are people with many different lifestyles and cultures."
She also learned the importance of being honest with herself about her struggles instead of maintaining a facade of success. "The most surprising thing I learned about myself was how tough I had to be in many cases. I was not even able to express how bad, isolated, and lonely I felt because I needed to keep going—at least I thought so."
For those considering a similar move, Laura offers this advice: "Ask yourself why you really want to go there. It's very important to know your reasons behind such a big decision. Every time you're in doubt, you can bring back this reason: 'I'm doing this because...' And if this still keeps you going, that's good. If it's no longer valid, don't be afraid to go back. It's fine; the world isn't ending."
Finding Home
Through all her transitions, Laura has come to a profound understanding of belonging. Like many expats, she experiences the strange feeling of not belonging 100% to either her home country or her adopted one.
"It is a strange feeling," she acknowledges. "I think what I figured so far is that it's very important to know and remember your origin, to have this grounding somewhere. But also to grow roots in your new place—seeing how you can fit and build your life there."
When asked where home is now, Laura answers without hesitation: "Portugal." She's getting married next year and taking serious steps toward building her life there permanently.
For Laura, happiness looks like "having my loved ones close to me and having time so that I can do with it what I want."
Her journey reminds us that sometimes the most meaningful paths in life are the ones we didn't plan—and that home isn't always where we start, but where we choose to plant our roots.
Have you lived abroad or are you considering it? What challenges or surprises did you encounter? Share your experience in the comments below!
